Revel Body SOL Review

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Clitoral vibrators are probably my favorite kind of sex toy to date.  I mean, I love sex toys in general, but clitoral vibes are by far the most used in my arsenal.  So of course when Revel Body offered for me to review their new vibrator, I wasn’t going to say no.

revel1

A little bit about it: The Revel Body SOL (not to be confused with the original Revel Body) is a waterproof, rechargeable, clitoral vibrator that comes with 3 interchangeable heads.  It doesn’t so much just vibrate like most vibes, but instead has a removable center piston that pumps in and out.  It has six settings, and a simple 3 button operation: On/Off, power up, and power down.

What I loved: I’ll say this for the Revel Body, it is very different.  The round shape fits in my hands comfortably, and the pumping sensation instead of a normal vibration really does feel quite good against my clitoris.  The interchangeable heads allows me to customize the sensation.  Unfortunately, my love of the design doesn’t overshadow some pretty big problems I had with it.

revel2What I didn’t: Although the first three settings are pleasurable and the third setting is strongish, the last three of the 6, including their touted “OM” setting, don’t seem to affect me.  When I use these settings I can’t even feel anything on my clitoris.  Nothing.  Even though the company makes it clear that it’s actually the first 3 settings that are the strongest, I would think their OM setting would at least do something for me, since it’s such a huge selling point.  I tried using the OM setting elsewhere on my body, since the Revel Body SOL is also supposed to be good for body massages, but it just tickles.  I simply don’t understand this setting.

Now let’s talk about power.  The third setting is admittedly strong…ish… but not quite strong enough for me.  I am the first one to stand up and say my clitoris is not particularly sensitive, but the We-Vibe Touch and Tango as well as the Je Joue MiMi can bring me to orgasm without much of an issue.  The Revel Body SOL, however, gets me close, and that’s it.  Agonizingly close.  Frustratingly close.  Angeringly close.  And that’s it.  I found that I was getting so irritated by being so close and not being able to orgasm that I was reaching for other toys.  It never pushes me over the edge to orgasm, and that’s where I simply give up on this vibrator.

Final thought: The Revel Body SOL is a nice try at a revolutionary vibrator.  For those with clitorises more sensitive than mine, it may very well work for you.  For those of you that need a little more power to get to orgasm, you’ll probably want to pass this one up.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Tantus Raptor XL Review

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~tantus raptor xl

Something about the Tantus Raptor has always appealed to me, but have never been able to figure out exactly why.  Maybe it’s the fact it comes in two sizes (regular and XL).  Maybe it’s the colors.  Mostly, though, I think it’s the shape.  There’s something really visually appealing about the shape of the head and testicles that don’t look like they’ve been sheared off at the base, like most ball-having toys are.  Honestly, I’ve always found that sheared look pretty creepy.  There’s none of that here.  But as usual, I digress.

A little bit about it:  The Raptor XL is a silicone dildo that is larger than most standard dildos at 5 3/8 inches in circumference and an insertable length of just under 6 inches, with a total length of just under 10 inches.  It comes orange, purple and black.

What I loved: First, like most Tantus toys, it’s 100% silicone.  If you haven’t picked up on it, I have a love of silicone toys.  I especially love that they are easy to clean, non porous, and can be easily sterilized.  In this case, you can bleach it, boil it, or stick it in the dishwasher.

I typically don’t like vaginal toys with a straight shaft.  They usually don’t do a whole lot for my G-spot unless I try to get creative with the angle of entry, but that sort of thing ends up tiring me out pretty fast and killing any enjoyment.  That’s not the case here.  The Raptor, although not curved, comes away at a slight angle from the base, and has a rather bulbous, tear drop-shaped head with a definite boundary between the shaft and head.  These two things together make it great for G-spotting and I was very surprised at how easily I was able to orgasm with it.raptorxl2The shaft and testicles are a silky textured silicone (some people call it “buttery”), and it feels great in my fingers.  The head is a glossy silicone, which adds to the difference in sensation between the shaft and head.

What I didn’t: The head has some drag to it, so some water-based lubricant is advisable.

Final thought:  The Raptor XL retails for just under $96, but it will last a very long time with proper care.  In my opinion, totally worth it, especially if you like larger toys.  If you don’t, give this one a pass.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Love is Art Kit Review

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

We made a sex painting!  And it is gloriousLove is Art sells kits containing paint, canvas, tarp, booties (for post-painting walk to the shower), and body scrubbie.  Basically everything you need to make your very own intimate painting (with the exception of the stretchers you’d need to hang it.  You’re on your own for that, but they do include printed instructions in the kit and a video tutorial on their site, and offer a separate stretcher bar kit you can buy).

A little bit about it: The idea of the Love is Art kit is pretty simple.  You lay down the included large tarp, place the canvas on top of it, place drops of paint on your canvas, and then go to town on the paint.  Make love.  Cuddle.  Fingerpaint like you’re in kindergarten again.  Whatever strikes your fancy.  Afterwards, put on the booties and use the scrubbie to shower off.  Allow the paint to dry, then do the canvas stretching.  Hang it up, enjoy the view, and watch your guests try to figure out what they are looking at and why you bought this particular painting (or maybe that last part is just me).

liakit1

Tarp and canvas laid out

Our painting night:  The only space we had in the house that is big enough for this project is the middle of our living room on the terrazzo floor.  Do you know what terrazzo is?  It’s concrete with embedded marble chips, aka, a really, really hard floor.  This is not something we thought about as we were setting up.  We placed the canvas down, and as per the tips in the instructions, we put the bottles of paint in a bowl of warm water to warm the paint.

Our custom kit included black, silver, and blue paint, and we had a few minutes of fun dribbling the paint all over the canvas.  Then it was time to actually make the painting.  We were shocked to find that by the time we were finished dribbling the paint, it had become ice cold, and we got quite a shock when we actually got onto the paint.  But, like jumping into a cold pool, the shock was over quickly.

Pre-fun paint dribbles.  This is getting it ready for the actual painting.

Pre-fun paint dribbles. This is getting it ready for the actual painting.

We tried some of our favorite positions, but we honestly spent way more time giggling than in orgasmic bliss.  The floor was too hard to do anything comfortable (in hindsight, we should have put a fleece blanket under the tarp).  And, I mean, come on.  We’re covered in paint and watching our bodies make designs on the canvas.  There’s a boob!  Look, I accidentally made a footprint!  Is that your butt cheek?  It’s funny.

When we were done, we put on the included booties and hustled it to the shower.  The paint took a little work to get off with the scrubbie, but not so much that we really thought it was an issue.  However, when we got out of the shower, I was shocked to look behind me and see big blue footprints from the living room to bathroom.  The booties were too thin!  The paint leaked right through!  I hustled to get the paint cleaned off the floor before it set.  It came up easily, but it killed the mood a little bit to have to hurry to get it cleaned up.

We laid the painting out to dry.  Husband loves the way it turned out, but I mentioned that it came out a little too dark for my tastes.  That’s my fault, as I picked the colors and put too much black down on the canvas.  We are considering adding other colors to it before we stretch it to brighten it up.

liakit3

Finished!

What we loved:  The Love is Art kits allow couples (or singles) to get really fun and creative with their self expression and love life, creating a piece of art that is uniquely them.  And because the resulting paintings don’t look overtly sexual (unless you are trying to make them so), the painting can be hung anywhere.

I love that the canvas is so large, and the creators thought enough to add touches like booties and a body scrubber for after.  It would seem they don’t want you to just make a painting.  They want you to make an experience.

What I didn’t:  The major thing is the booties.  I hate that having paint leak through the booties killed the mood.  I went from happy-giggly-sex-is-great to holy-crap-I-hope-this-doesn’t-stain-the-floor.  I don’t know if thicker booties would be an viable option for the company, but that would be awesome.

Final thought: Kits sell for roughly between $60-80.  As long as you are handy enough to do the canvas stretching yourself (or have a friend or shop nearby that can do it for you), it’s most certainly worth the asking price.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Tantus Adam O2 Review

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~adamo2

I have a thing for Tantus’s O2 line.  I’ve mentioned before that I’m impressed with the material when I reviewed the Cush O2.  It’s so touchable.  So squishable.  So different.  How could I resist the opportunity to review another O2 toy?  Tantus was kind enough send me the Adam O2.

A little bit about it: The Adam O2 is made of Tantus’s dual density silicone, with a soft outer and and a firm inner core.  It has a gentle G-spot curve, and is roughly 5″ around and 7″ long.

What I loved: The Adam brings together so many things that I love.  Not only is it silicone, but the curve is just perfect.  It’s not so much that it’s uncomfortable, but just enough curve that it hits my G-spot very easily without me having to contort and wiggle to try to get it to hit.

Even though the outside is soft, the inside is solid.  Since this is a G-spot dildo, and I need firm pressure on my G-spot in order to orgasm, the hard core allows me to use pressure, while the soft outer provides wonderful sensations.

What I didn’t: The Adam only comes in flesh-like tones (“cream,” “cocoa” and “black”), but I’d love to see it in some more wild colors.

Final thought: The Adam O2 sells for just over $108, but worth every penny.  Between the O2 material and the wonderful curve, the Adam is quickly becoming one of my favorite toys.  With proper care it will last a long, long time.

~I received this item in exchange for an honest review.~

Bedroom Misadventures: Episode 12

One of the very, very few adult stores in my area had their annual ladies’ night party.  They brought in games, raffles, vendors/manufacturers, and male strippers.  Everyone was super excited about the male strippers.  Apparently.

I perused among the games, but they were all casino-like games that I had no interest in.  Most of the other women there were having a marvelous time with them, though.  Now, to be fair, I knew ahead of time that’s the kind of games that would be there, but I wasn’t there for the games.  I was there to network with the many toy companies that were there, ’cause, I mean, blog.

I moved among the vendors, and was incredibly delighted that some of the reps knew exactly who I was, and chatted with me about all the changes they are making, new toys coming out, and offering me first crack at some new, exciting products.  It was a fantastic start.  When I moved further in the room, I met some other reps from companies I knew nothing about, but I’m all for trying out new companies.

One of the new-to-me companies presented me with some mini-vibes that they were excited about.  They didn’t seem all that interesting to me, and I’m the honest-but-polite type, so I handed back the small vibes and commented that the toy pouch they come in is cute. The rep made that his selling point, boasting that they are the first toy company to offer that kind of pouch.  Isn’t it fantastic?  Isn’t it amazing?  Isn’t it just fabulous?  Not really.  It’s a pouch.  A nice pouch, but still a pouch.  I don’t encourage my readers to shell out tons of money for a nice pouch.

Moving on through the vendors, I came across another company that I didn’t know about.  The woman behind the table showed me a tiny ceramic vibrator, made for the clitoris.  She waited for me to be wowed. I commented that I liked the color (it wasn’t pink.  That alone deserves a positive comment).  She placed it my hand and turned it on.  I guess this was the part where I was supposed to coo and ask if I could buy one, but I wasn’t impressed.  It felt very buzzy, not rumbly at all, like a typical cheap bullet vibe, just made of a better material.  I handed it back to her, told her thank you, but it’s not the kind of vibrations I like.  She made a face like I had just killed a puppy in front of her.

I finished making the rounds of all the companies I wanted to talk to (and I few that I specifically avoided), and just hung around for a while, waiting for the end of the night festivities: a big raffle and a bunch of male strippers.  Sure, why not.  I’ve never seen strippers, male or otherwise.  It could be interesting.

As I wandered from the vendor/manufacturer tables back into the main room where the raffle would be held, a well-dressed man stepped into my path and stopped me, which honestly freaked me out a little.  It felt kind of aggressive and more than a little off-putting.

“Have you been Kangaroo’d?” he asked me.

Um…What?

Then he shoved this in my hand.

kangaroopill

Oh, so THAT’S how to make it easy to be a woman. I’ve been doing it wrong for years.

 

Uh…OK…  Weird.  One of my friends later asked me if I had in fact taken the little pill.  [Sarcasm] Yes, because I’m in the habit of taking pills given to me by strangers. [/Sarcasm]  No, of course I didn’t take it.  I didn’t know who this guy was, I’d never heard of the company, and didn’t remember the company name being rattled off the vendor list.

I joined a crowd of people and made idle chit chat with a late middle-aged woman with a deep tan and a bright sundress (I’m not making a negative comment on her clothing, so we’re clear.  I just happen to remember that about her).  She had an alcoholic drink in her hand, but I went out to the patio in search of a bottle of water.  I’m not really a drinker.  She followed me out, ended up running into me and spilling her [very cold] drink down my back.

The night was coming to an end and it was time for the raffle and male strippers.  There were a couple of good things in the raffle, so I stayed for a while.  They trotted out the strippers, blah blah, rippling muscles, no shirts, jumping around, blah blah.  The women around me were screaming, clapping, pulling out their cell phones to take videos and photos.  I watched the guys for a few minutes but then–and I may lose my lady card for this–I got bored.  It turns out that a hot guy in and of himself does nothing for me.  I moved to the back of the room, pulled out my phone, and texted Husband that maybe I really am a sapiosexual after all.  All the sceaming around me every time one of the guys flexed or did a rather hokey dance was actually getting on my nerves.

I ended up leaving early and giving my prize tickets to a woman next to me.  Did I have fun?  Well, mostly.  I met some great people from fantastic companies, and even though I didn’t find male strippers interesting, like, at all, it’s good to find out that’s not my thing.  I can avoid uncomfortable bachelorette parties.

And Then I Got a Piercing Part 5

Miss the other parts?  Find them here: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Once upon a time (in October, in case you are wondering), we had the brilliant stupid mildly questionable idea to have my nipples pierced.  It seemed like a good idea at the time, and as soon as I felt the pain, the piercing was done.  And the looked nice.  Sexy.  Pretty.  But the piercings came with a pretty high physical price tag: lots of aftercare and alternating between intense pain and annoying soreness for 2 months after the piercings.  By 3 months after, I finally felt OK.  Not bad for a piercing that can take a year or more to heal, I thought.

As time went on, things seemed OK, aside from the occasional embarrassing mishap.  They weren’t sore any more and I was able to change the piercings (even though the mere act of changing the piercings made them sore for a week).  I had to admit that they were pretty, sparkly and sexy, but I always felt a little sad at the same time.  Most of the types of nipple play I liked were completely out of the question, since playing with my nipples, even a little bit roughly, even a little, made me sore for days after.

And then there were the general problems.  The piercings sometimes got caught when I was toweling off after a shower or getting dressed.  Occasionally Husband would roll over in bed and pin one of the piercings, making me howl in pain.  Even though in my day-to-day life I had no problems, on the occasions I did, there was lots of pain.

A friend and his wife were asking me about my piercings and how hard they are to get done, aftercare, etc, etc.  I described the sensations, along with some of the problems I had.  I didn’t think I was speaking negatively about them, but my guy friend frowned.  “It sounds like you don’t like them very much.”

No.  Nononono.  Of course I like them.  Right?  Riiiiight?  But the more I thought about it, the more I realized he was right.  I was not in love with them.  They looked pretty, but they made me uncomfortable.  Worse, they made sexy nipple play pretty much a thing of the past.

A few days ago I rolled over in bed and found Husband awake.  I asked him what he thought about my nipple piercings, since he had once loved them so very much.

“I don’t know that I like them any more,” he said.  “I miss playing with your nipples without worrying about hurting them.  What do you think?”

“I like the way they look, but they’re always in the way.  All the time.  I’m tired of getting them hurt.  But once they’re out, they’re out.  The holes close up immediately, and they can’t be put back.”

“You can always get them repierced later if you want,” he said.

And so, they came out.  And I am so glad they did.  I really didn’t realize how much I hated them until they were gone and I was no longer snagging them in the shower or worried about Husband rolling on top of them in bed.

Will I get them redone later?  Honestly, probably not.  The healing process was long and gruelling (although a friend of mine who got her nipples pierced told me that she felt perfectly fine after a few days, compared to my few months).  I missed having my nipples played with in bed without worrying about getting hurt.  I missed not having to constantly worry about infection.  I’m not sorry I got nipple piercings, but I am done with the damn things.

Tantus Slow Drive Review

slowdrive~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

I squealed like a little girl at a boy band concert when I first saw the Tantus Slow Drive.  It wasn’t because it was made by Tantus (even though that’s awesome), nor was it because it was a shape I haven’t encountered (which is also awesome).  It was…sigh…because it came in silver.  Yes, I wanted it because of the color.  Stop judging me.  And it’s not a bad toy.  In fact, it’s a very good toy, but unfortunately, it’s not for me.  Let’s explore, shall we?

A little bit about it: The Slow Drive is a non-vibrating G-spot dildo with a dramatic G-spot curve.  It’s made of 100% silicone, and measures on the smallish side, coming in at roughly 4 inches around and 6 inches long (5 insertable).

What I loved: The color, the color, THE COLOR!  Besides that, the Slow Drive has some great things going for it.  The silicone is beautiful, glossy and shimmery, and of course body safe and easy to clean.  The tear drop shaped base is much easier for me to hold as opposed to the standard round bases.

The shape is absolutely brilliant.  The steep angle of the end hits my G-spot with very little effort and without me having to contort to get the toy at exactly the right angle.  I’d love to see more silicone toys with the tip curved like this toy.

What I didn’t: The Slow Drive loses a couple of points for me for two reasons.  First, it’s not quite long enough or girthy enough for me to really, really love it, but the angle of the tip compensates for it.  Plus, there is a longer version of the Slow Drive, if I really wanted it.

Second, and this is the big problem for me, it’s a little too flexible.  I need very firm pressure on my G-spot, but when I try that with the Slow Drive, it ends up bending.  This has been a problem in the past with other toys.  Was I able to orgasm with the slight flexibility of the Slow Drive?  Yes.  Was it easy?  No.

Final thought: The Slow Drive sells for $44, which in my opinion is a very fair price for a high quality silicone toy, especially one from a great company like Tantus.  And even though I can see the benefits of the Slow Drive, it’s not for me or for others that need very solid pressure on their G-spots.  I would recommend it, though, to those that are new to toys or only need semi-firm G-spot pressure.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Vamp SIlicone Frida Review

p5rn7vb

~I received this item in exchange for an honest review.~frida

Silicone is one of my absolute favorite materials for sex toys.  It can be soft and flexible or completely stiff and with no give.  It can be buttery soft and velvety against my fingers, or create so much friction it pulls the skin.  And then when a myriad of colors are introduced, the possibilities are endless.

Several weeks ago I discovered Vamp Silicone, which offers toys in both soft and regular skin, and a wide range of colors.  The colors, above anything else, attracted me to them, and they were kind enough to send me a Frida for review.

A little bit about it: The Frida is made of 100% silicone, and has a wide but thin base and a small but very pronounced head.  It’s on the larger side, coming in at approximately 7 3/4″ long and 5 1/2″ around (by my measurements).

frida2What I loved: The first and most obvious thing is the color.  It’s so refreshing to have choices that aren’t either pink or purple.  The red and white swirls are simply gorgeous.

The Frida is within my perfect size zone.  It’s not so big that it’s challenging, but it is on the larger side, so it tends to hit all the good spots simultaneously.

The size and color are great, but there is one seemingly small point that makes the Frida unique among the many other silicone dildos I have.  It’s the shape of the head.  It doesn’t look like much, and when I took it out of the package I certainly didn’t notice anything special, but the head is different.  It’s smaller and more compact than the other toys I’ve seen of this size, but at the same time the ridge between the head and shaft are more pronounced and at a slightly sharper angle.  When I used it, this caused it to pop past my vaginal ring of muscles and G-spot, and back again, giving me easy and intense stimulation.

What I didn’t: The toy arrived with a strong smell that I interpreted as a cherry scent, but the manufacturer assured me that it is most likely the soap they use to wash their toys before they are shipped out.  The scent disappeared in a few days.

Final thought: The Frida sells for between $75-90, depending on the firmness.  Even though there are many standard silicone dildos out there, the compact yet pronounced shape of the head of the Frida allows this one to really stand out.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

FC2 Review

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~fc21

As a sex blogger I’m ashamed to say it, but when I heard people talking about the FC2 (aka the “female condom”) a few weeks ago, my first thought was, “Are those even still a thing?  I haven’t seen them anywhere.”  I started to look into them and what other people were saying.  Some people loved them, and some seemed to have a head-scratching, rage-filled vendetta against them.  Certainly this required some hands on research, and FC2 were kind enough to send me some samples to try.

A little bit about it: The FC2 is made of a non-latex synthetic rubber and made to be worn inside the vagina.  There is an inner flexible ring in the closed end that floats freely (see photo below), and a stiff yet flexible attached ring on the open end.  Since it’s non-latex, water, oil,  and silicone based lubricants can be used, both inside and on the outside of the condom.

fc2

FC2 wtih the inner ring removed

Experience: The first time we used the FC2, we weren’t sure what we thought of it.  It was difficult to get in, and there was a lot of friction on Husband.  We stopped so he could relube with some Sliquid water based lubricant, but the lubricant dissipated before long.  By the end of the first time we used it, we had come to the conclusion that there is some merit here, but it was going to take practice.

The good news is by the time we were going our second round with the FC2, we had found our rhythm.  We had just needed the practice.  Insertion and placement were much easier when I used some lubricant on the outside, and instead of using water based lubricant on the inside, we used silicone lubricant, which doesn’t need to be reapplied nearly as often.  With practice and the right lubricant combination, we were ready to really test.

What we loved: After a little practice, the FC2 really is very easy to use.  Do you remember the first time you ever used the standard male condom?  It’s kind of odd, you probably fumbled with it a little bit, but after a few times it was fine.  It’s exactly like that.

There is no question that the little bit of silicone lubricant that comes on the FC2 is simply not enough lubrication.  It does very little to cut down on friction.  After adding more silicone lubrication, Husband easily slid along inside the FC2 with no issues.  And this is important.  Because there was sliding against his skin (as opposed to there being sliding on the outside of a male condom), it was much more pleasurable for him, and he reports that as a result it feels closer to there being no barrier at all than the sensations with a standard male condom.

Oh, and did I mention there is this huge plus?  The FC2 can be inserted before foreplay starts.  Before there’s even an erection.  Before you get to the bedroom.

What we didn’t: For me, the feeling is slightly different than a male condom.  There is slightly, and I do mean slightly less sensation than I’ve felt with the standard male condoms, but it’s such a small difference that it’s almost negligible.

Final thought: The FC2 sells for $5-7 for a package of three, which admittedly is pricier than standard male condoms.  However, the trade off is a condom that can be put in ahead of intercourse, doesn’t rely on erection, and, in the case of dear Husband, provides a little more sensation than male condoms.  In my opinion, totally worth it.

~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~

Sex Blanket Sewing Tutorial

blanket9(Update at the end of post)

Have you seen sex blankets around?  They are waterpoof or water resistant pads or throw blankets made for sex, because, well, sex is messy.  Lubricants, fluids, and even female ejaculate make quite a mess.  A fun mess, sure, but no one wants to sleep in the wet spot on the bed that showed up at 11:30pm on a Wednesday.

But many of those sex blankets are expensive, often $100+.  I tried to find something I could use instead, but was woefully disappointed.  Plastic mattress protectors aren’t particularly sexy.  Reading the reviews for big, waterproof blankets hinted at the fact that they aren’t necessarily waterproof.

I thought to myself, well, I’m crafty.  Seriously, folks, it’s amazing how many times I say that and end up just sewing something I love. I can probably just make one of my own design.  And heyyyyy…I bet other people will want to know how to do it, too.  So here it is, the tutorial I promised…

Waterproof Sex Blanket

No matter what size you intend on making your blanket, you can use these instructions for it, just adjust the size.  The basic steps are the same.  For simplicity for those not familiar with sewing, I’m going to tell you exactly what materials I used.  Also, you can make this project by hand if you don’t have a sewing machine.  If you do have a sewing machine, be aware that you will end up sewing through many, many layers by the time you are done.  If your sewing machine won’t handle that kind of load, just stitch by hand.

You will basically need 3 things: a soft, comfortable upper layer (the side touching your skin), absorbent middle layers (cotton is good; you can even use old towels if you choose), and a waterproof bottom layer.  I used double-sided minky fleece for my upper, several layers of birdseye cotton for my middle layer, and PUL (polyurethane laminate) for the bottom.

The following instructions make two blankets for a total cost of around $50, or about $25 a piece.  The blankets will end up being roughly 28×34″, unless you end up having to trim them up more than once (like I did…when the layers moved on me…)  In that case, they will be slightly smaller.

Materials:blanket1
-1 yard of 60″ wide double sided minky fleece for the upper (or size and soft material of your choice)
-1 yard of 60″ wide PUL for the waterproof layer
-8 yards of 36″ wide birdseye cotton (this gives 4 layers per blanket), or absorbent layer of your choice
-Needles and coordinating thread.

Step one:
Wash and dry your fabrics.  Always wash and dry (following the care instructions) before you sew with them.  Always.  Press (iron flat) the cotton inner layer, but NOT the PUL or minky.  A hot iron could damage them.

Step two:
If you are using 60″ wide minky, cut it in half so you have two 30×36″ rectangles.  If you are using doing a custom size, cut it to whatever size you wish, plus a few extra inches.  Do the same for the PUL layer. [Note: The company I bought my PUL from had just a tiny bit left on their roll, so sent me a little extra, so I added an extra narrow strip.  Yours won't have that.]

blanket2Step three:
Cut the middle layers to the same size as the minky and PUL.  I used 4 layers of cotton birdseye per blanket to be on the safe side.

Step four:
Now you’re going to stack your layers.  If they don’t match up exactly, don’t panic.  We’ll trim them down in a minute.  Stack your layers in this specific order (if making two blankets, you’ll do this twice, once for each blanket):

-Place the minky or upper fabric on your table, right side facing up.
-On top of the minky, put the PUL face down (the shiny side should be facing you).
-On top of the PUL, place your absorbent layer(s).

If you are not a sewer, I know that order doesn’t make sense.  Trust me.  It will make sense in a minute.

Step five:
Pin your fabrics together so they don’t move.  If your edges don’t quite line up (mine never do), go ahead and trim the edges so they line up.

[Note: You'll see an extra, thin line of PUL on mine.  That's the remnants from the end of the bold from the store.  Yours won't have that.  Pretend it's not there.]

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Step six:
Sew all the layers together using a wide seam, but make sure you leave a few inches together unsewn. This will leave a hole on the side. We’ll use that gap to turn it right side out in a few minutes.  If your sewing machine won’t handle all these layers, stitch by hand.

blanket4Clip your corners, but careful not to hit your sewing line.  This will give you a crisp corner when you finish your blanket.  Again, trust me here.  I promise.

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Trim down the edges on the outside of the lines you sewed so they aren’t so wide, but be careful not to hit your sewing line.  This will make the seams less bulky.

Step seven:
Now we’re going to turn the blanket right side out.  Find the hole you left open.  Hold it open and arrange it so the minky (upper) side is in your right hand, and all the other layers are in your left (make sure the layers in your left hand stay together).  With this hole you created with the minky on one side and the other layers on the other, turn it right side out (think like a pillow case).

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Take a pencil, pen, crochet hook, or something long and thin with a blunt or round tip (no, I’m actually not making a sex joke), and use it to push the corners out from the inside.  You’re going to have to put your hand in the hole for that.  Also not a sex joke.

Step eight:
Now we’re going to topstitch.  This is an optional step, but it helps hold the blanket layers together and makes it look nice.  A topstitch is just a line of stitching on the top of the blanket.  On this, it almost makes a ditch/gusset.  Make sure you catch the hole you left to close it up.

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If you aren’t doing a topstitch, make sure you at least go back and close the hole you made when you turned your blanket right side in.

And there you have it!  Mine ended up roughly 24×30″.  Why did they end up so small?  Sadly, I didn’t pin my layers well enough and they shifted, leaving me to have to trim the edges back even again, causing me to lose a few inches.

But does it work?  Yes!  Of course we took our new sex blanket for a test drive, and it absolutely works.  The minky is soft and sensual against skin, and the absorbent cotton and waterproof PUL keeps any fluids from leaking down onto the sheets.

So, that’s it!  Any questions?

UPDATE: Some of my sex positive friends endeavored to come up with a great name for my sex blanket, since “sex blanket” doesn’t quite fit.  Putting their brains and puns together, they came up with the Screwvet (rhymes with duvet).  There you have it.  Screwvet.