I’m always so very, very wary when a company claims to have new, better technology or information, guaranteed to give you the perfect orgasm. Usually, these fall far, far short of their claims. I’ve seen it in everything from books to vibrators. In my experience, the more they claim to be the be-all, end-all of all things orgasm, the worse they end up actually being.
The first email I received from Womanizer company reps talked about their new, amazing technology, and how women are coming within 60 seconds, blah blah blah, and I thought, “Well, I haven’t done a negative review for a while. Why not give it a whirl.”
I will be the first to stand up and admit when I am wrong. For once, someone that claims to have new, amazing technology actually has it.
A little bit about it: The Womanizer is a combination gentle sucking/vibrating toy that attaches to the head of your clitoris. Not the shaft. The head. It is multispeed and rechargeable, but it is not waterproof. The soft heads that make contact with the body can be removed for cleaning.
What I loved: Let me start here by giving you a little background about me. It can sometimes be difficult for me to reach orgasm. I need strong(ish) vibrations, at the very least. My favorite toys are the We-Vibe Touch, Tango, and the Magic Wand for this reason. Little, barely felt toys? Not my thing. It can sometimes take me 20-40 minutes before I reach orgasm, sometimes an hour (although on a good day, 10 will do if the conditions are right and I really concentrate).
I didn’t expect to actually be able to reach climax with the Womanizer. I felt the vibrations in my hand, and although pleasant, could hardly be described as strong. I felt just a slight little suction on my fingers.
Then came testing time! The suction needs to lay right on the head of the clitoris. I’m usually not a fan of anything touching my clitoris directly for a few reasons. One, even when erect, my clitoral hood keeps it covered. You know how some female-bodied people’s clitoral heads poke out when they are aroused? Yeah? I’m not one of those. Because of that, my clitoral head is insanely sensitive, and not in the touch-me-and-I-orgasm way. More like touch-me-and-I-punch-you-stop-that-really-hurts kind of way. So generally speaking, my clitoral head is a no-fly zone. My clitoral shaft, however, is aces, and that’s what I usually stimulate to reach orgasm (and possibly why I need stronger vibrations and it takes me forever and a day).
I tried the Womanizer on my clitoral shaft. It felt…nice, I guess?… but not much else. I turned it on low and carefully placed it on my clitoral head. It actually felt good. Like, really good. The combination of slight suction and mild vibration was the best feeling I ever had from a toy. In under 2 minutes, I reached climax.
And it was a surprise climax, one I did not expect. By all accounts, it should not have worked. The whole idea sounded so very hokey. I held it in my hand and demanded it to tell my why it works. When it didn’t answer, I threw it at Husband and demanded the same thing of him. He asked me to let him watch so he could see it in action. I obliged, and afterwards he scratched his head and said, “Huh. I’ve never seen you come that fast.”
It shouldn’t work. But it does. Toe curling, quick orgasms like I’ve never felt. And more than that, the orgasms are…I don’t know how to put it…different? They feel more localized to the clitoral area as opposed to the deep ones I would get from another vibrator. Not better, not worse, just fascinatingly different. And if you’ve been reading me for a while, you know I’m all about different.
But, all this could be a fluke, right? Maybe my anatomy is just right or something. Fortunately, I have a small circle of really, really good friends I can rely on to help me when I need a second opinion. I grabbed a gal pal of mine and handed it off to her. Same affect. Orgasm in less than 5 minutes.
BIG, MAJOR, IMPORTANT THING I LEARNED WHILE USING: For me, if I used too much pressure, or much pressure at all, all the sensation deadened, and it took forever to orgasm. When I went back to barely there pressure, it went back to fast orgasms. Bear that in mind if you try this toy.
What I didn’t: Oh, geez, can we just talk about the name for a minute? Like, seriously. To be perfectly honest, if I was walking through an adult boutique and saw Womanizer written on the box, I would have rolled my eyes and walked away. Who wants to think of the creepy guy at the club that won’t stop hitting on you and has you running for cover when you reach for your vibrator? With that name, I would have looked no closer. If someone thought that was a good name for a toy for women/female-bodied persons, then they probably would not understand female anatomy, either. Ew. Looking at the box still makes me shudder a little. Someone in marketing seriously dropped the ball on this one.
I told the name of the toy to a dear friend of mine who also happens to be the least politically correct person I know. Even he raised his eyebrows and said, “I’m sorry, they called it what?”
Anyway, let’s talk briefly about the function. It is quiet, for the most part, but my gal friend and I both noticed the same problem. The control button rattles very, very loudly when in use, and it’s best to keep your finger lightly on it to keep the noise down if you don’t want your neighbors or housemates to hear you. A minor issue, but certainly worth a note.
Final thought: I’m not going to lie to you. The Womanizer’s amazingness (is that a word? I’m going with it) comes with a price tag to match. On Good Vibrations, it sells for $189. Usually, with a toy price that high I try to give my readers similar, quality toys for less if they don’t like the price tag, but there simply is nothing else like this. This is probably the first time since I tried the Mona 2 that I can say the price tag is most certainly worth it. I highly recommend this toy.
~I received this item for free in exchange for an honest review.~