Titles and Whatnot

I have thoughts.  And then more thoughts.  And then those thoughts have thoughts of their own.  And the next thing I know, I can’t remember what I was up to.

Oh, right.  I remember now.  Titles.

The title of my blog, technically, is Rolling in the Hay: Life.  Marriage.  Sex toys.  I feel like people are going to focus on the term “sex toys.”  Even though this blog is going to have my experiences and reviews,  it won’t have only that.  I wonder if I should just shorten it to Rolling in the Hay.  But then I would have to redo my header.  Again.  If you’ve been watching, today is the only day since I started this blog that I haven’t tweaked the header several times.

If I was just looking around at different blogs or specifically marriage blogs and saw “sex toys” as part of the title, I would probably click away.  Unless, of course, I was looking for that.

Oh, what to do.

We-Vibe Touch Review

~I originally received this item at a 30% discount in exchange for writing an honest review off site.~

NOTE: This review is for the original We-Vibe Touch, that had the glossy silicone.  The updated versions are velvety/buttery silicone with less drag.

I’ll be blunt: the thing about cheap sex toys is that they are, well, cheap.  Think about it.  How do cheap toys stay cheap?  Well, it has been my experience that they are generally crap.  The last time I loved a cheap toy was when I didn’t know any better.  Since I’ve learned about different materials and their safety, batteries vs. plug-ins vs. rechargeables, sizes and shapes…let’s say that when I go shopping for a new addition, I have at least a vague idea of what I’m looking for.

Personally, I won’t touch anything that’s jelly or skin-like.  Too many people are raising too many health-related questions about them.  I figure I’d rather be safe than sorry and avoid them whenever possible.  But that’s me.  And you’re you.

Moving on.  When I go for toys, I much prefer silicone, or at least phthalate-free plastic, but I like silicone better.  Sometimes glass or metal.  Mostly silicone.

Which brings me, in a really round about way, to my point.  And the point of this post.  Everyone say hi to the We-Vibe Touch!

A little bit about it: the Touch is a rechargeable clitoral vibrator made of a glossy silicone (or possibly silicone covered plastic), about 4 inches long with a pointed end and a dip on one side.  At the base there is a single button that allows me to scroll through 8 vibration modes (4 speeds and 4 patterns).  Because there is only one button, if I miss the setting I want, I have to circle back around.  According to the company, the Touch is waterproof, but I haven’t tested that yet.

*Quick note on silicone*  Silicone toys don’t get along with other silicone toys or lubes.  That means that even though I love my silicone toys, I have to keep them separate because if they touch, they will damage each other.  The same goes for silicone lubricant.  Silicone lubricant MUST NOT be used on silicone toys.  A bummer, since I love both silicone toys and silicone lubricant.

What I loved:  Like I said, the Touch is a clitoral vibrator, not a vaginal one.  It’s made to be used on the outside of the body.  I found the shape to be fantastic for both broad and pinpoint stimulation, and the vibrations are nice and deep and rumbly.  It sat in the perfect external spot on me in the woman-on-top position with Husband.

I never cared for vibration patterns on my toys before, but I have to say that the Touch’s specific vibration patterns combined with how deep they are make me play with that function often.

What I didn’t love: I found that running on high, the Touch only lasts for about an hour with a 90 minute charge time, and starts to lose some power after about 20 minutes.  This means that I have to be all hot and bothered before I even reach for it instead of starting with some teasing, lest it die at a really bad time.

Even though the Touch worked really well for me in the woman-on-top position, in the man-on-top it hit my pubic bone pretty painfully.

Final thought: Love it.  Despite the comparatively short running time and long charging time, this has become my favorite in the toy box.  At least for the moment.

~I originally received this item at a 30% discount in exchange for writing an honest review off site.~

Body Paint Fail, aka, Too Much Baking Gets Me in Trouble

I’m a whole foods kind of person.  The practice, I mean, not the store.  OK, let me try that again.  I’m a from-scratch kind of person when it comes to food.  If I can make it instead of buy it, I do.  Everything from bread to chilli is whipped up in my kitchen.  And I like it.

Some weeks ago, I saw edible chocolate body paint for sale.  “Awesome,” I thought.  And then I looked at the ingredients.  Wow.  I didn’t know what most of that was.  Oh, wait.  Fake vanilla.  I recognized that one.  And who wants fake vanilla, anyway?  Blech.

But, hey, edible body paint!  Edible=food!  Food=recipe!  Recipe=I’m sooo on it!  TO THE INTERNET!!!

A short trip around Google showed me several recipes I could use.  Finally, tonight, I had the time to try one of them.  So while patiently dissolving sugar and water I went through the next ingredients in my mind.  I could see myself measuring out the cocoa powder.  I could also see myself using the remaining cocoa powder and emptying the container.  Could see it like it already happened.


I could see it like it already happened because it DID already happen.  I had finished up the cocoa powder when I made…sigh…chocolate oatmeal cookies as a snack for the kiddos.

No fun in the kitchen.  No chocolaty smell.  No body paint.

I’m here!

Ah, the obligatory introductory post.  As I start to write this first of firsts (and you were here for it!  Good for you!), I find I have no idea what to say.  I have oodles and oodles to say coming up, but what do you put in post number one?

Well, let’s do it this way.  I’ll tell you about my super humble self.  I’m a wife.  A mom.  A human.  I’m madly in love with my life and the love of my life, the Husband.

Several years ago, when I was in my late teens, my sister gave me my very first vibrator.  (“What?  Your sister?!” Yes, my sister.  Focus, please.)  In the few years that comprised my young adulthood, I bought just a couple more.  My modern self knows that those toys weren’t stellar, and in fact the materials were downright scary, even dangerous, compared to the silicone that current high end toys are made of, but at the time I loved them.  Orgasms on command, both solo and with the Hubs.  How could I miss?

Did I mention these first toys were cheap?  Yeah, they were cheap.  They lasted a while before the motors died, or they broke, or they got lost.  I now know that not all sex toys are created equal!  Everyone should know that.  Seriously, I think vibrator safety and knowledge should be included in sex-ed.  If you ever think about buying any kind of marital aid (are they still called that?), it is so, so important to know what you are buying.  You just can’t go by what the box says.

That’s where I come in.  Here you’ll find my little journal of different toys I’ve tried, my experiences with them, how they stack up to each other, and of course bits about my married life with kids.  Boo-ya.